i have adventures (sometimes)

Friday 23 September 2016

Calling Love by its Right Name

Oh hey everyone how's 2016 going for you haha great me too
[Taking a beating from life and love - Owlturd Comix]
It's been a rough year.

I do have to admit that I have a pretty charmed life overall - I really can't complain.* But 2016 hit me with an an intensely stressful work environment, my dad being in a serious car accident, the end of a two-year relationship, a mugging, and a really fun extended depressive episode, within the span of about three months.

Here pictured post-breakup and post-mugging, having an actual literal pity party, hosted by kind friend Tara.
I'll write more about my long and exciting relationship with depression another time. Probably. For now I mainly want to say that the right medication has changed my life, and I'm slightly annoyed that I haven't been on it since I was like 14, because THINGS WOULD HAVE BEEN SO DIFFERENT.

But I survived. And for the first time in a while, I've found the self-confidence to write - and a concomitant interest in sharing my every feeling with the internet at length. (You're welcome.) So I'm returning to blogging with a bang to announce that

[I'M GIGANTICALLY QUEER - GIPHY]
(Is this how the coming out thing works? I'm new here.)

To be honest, I never really wanted to Come Out. A lot of people have known for ages, and I figured one day I'd just come home with a partner who wasn't a man, and the rest of my friends and family would be surprised but fine, and that would be it. A message to the family Whatsapp group to announce that I Am A Bisexual never felt particularly necessary or important.

But at the same time, I had to admit that there was a part of myself I was hiding in my "real" life. I've been very openly queer on Twitter for ages, where I do the majority of my poorly-anonymised fangirling and swearing about things. On Facebook (where I'm more restrained, and where my entire family is), I've always stopped just shy of saying it out loud.

Then I told a good friend that I was in love with her.